WORLD'S UGLIEST DOG CONTEST WINNER for.... 2011 1st Place Pedigree and 2010 2nd Place Title Holder. "Chronicles of Heinousness" is a rare look at the beauty and daily indignities of the offensive but lovable dog known as Handsome Hector. 'Copyright 2011', Gwiz
Thursday, November 10, 2011
Will mankind enter the 22nd century without solving the most pressing, unsolved mystery? The mystery of where and WHAT Handsome Hector came from?
Recently, genetic analysis was done to identify Handsome Hector's "special" lineage. One modern technique, known as genetic mapping, was instrumental in leading us to some very strong clues about Hector's ancestry. Initially the map lead us to the shared genetic ancestry of ET. We were very excited about this discovery until we witnessed a branching off of Hector's lineage from ET ancestry to the African Warthog family. At one other critical genetic intersection we followed a few mutated creatures that led to further shared ancestry which would make Hector the cousin of the pterodactyl. It appears the scientific community is in a confusional frenzy and has their work cut out for them. Although geneticists visited members of the seemingly closest relative to Hector to prove their findings, the African Warthogs themselves would not admit to having any direct or indirect connection to anything as heinous as Handsome Hector. In light of this data, we are still uncertain of what exact genetic or chromosomal interaction took place thousands of years ago to produce a Handsome Hector. Thus far, until more advanced techniques are introduced, Handsome Hector remains an unsolvable genetic mystery.Until then we will keep the public posted on our most recent findings and issue any public warnings if deemed necessary.