Friday, November 11, 2011

Chronicles of Heinousness

 Just when we thought that being good looking was the end-all to a "happy" life, Handsome Hector has single-handedly shown through his ravishing exterior that beauty is not only skin deep but that anyone can obtain love and the "high life" in spite of a hideous exterior. Born in Sacramento (circa 2000) with the heart and mannerisms of a true junkyard dog, Handsome Hector, a.k.a. Hecki, is, in his own opinion, devastatingly handsome. He is short (approximately 3 inches off the ground), fat, bald and never misses a day to alarm the general public with his handsomeness. He's quite proud and confident of his two combed hairs, and his confidence renders him fearless! Farting, snorting and smearing his naked body on duck excrement are just a few of the talents acquired during his time spent in finishing school. Despite all efforts on his mother's part to refine him, he remains to go where no other scrapper can or is willing to go....garbage cans, alley ways, public toilets and junkyards searching for that one divine crumb. Handsome Hector's life motto is to eat like a pig, look like a rat and lounge like a bloated seal!

'Copyright 2008', Ghada Marta

2 comments:

  1. Handsome Hectors ugliness is World Class!!!And now that his new motion picture,'''worst in show'' has debut, i hope it doesnt go to his balding wart covered head!! Hector your STAR is truly rising!!!

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  2. What can ya say? He is a little different. Perhaps, the rodent family? Where or what planet are his parents from? He would make ET proud if he were his dog. Nonetheless, he has my vote for whatever unique category he participates in. I am confident that Suzanne can fix up his two hairs. Good luck, 6-month or less Dave

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